Do remember in elementary school when you and your friends would talk on the playground about what it would be like to live hundreds of years ago? About fighting in duels and marrying princes? Well as someone who likes to be kept at a constant, warm temperature and who isn’t too fond of the idea of dying horribly of a plague or in a war, I was never very excited when it came to those conversations. Sure, it would be interesting to see what life all those years ago would be like, but I just don’t think I would be very good at, you know, living. So it comforts me to know that people who actually did live all those hundreds of years ago weren’t very good at it either, even when they really tried.

One of these old timers happened to be a Viking chieftain named Hastein who lived sometime in the 19th century. As the supposed son of Ragnar Lothbrok and the brother of Bjorn Ironside, Hastein had a lot to live up to. For the beginning of his raiding career, he was actually doing pretty well for himself. Described as “fierce, mightily cruel, and savage, pestilent, hostile, sombre, truculent, given to outrage, pestilent and untrustworthy, fickle, and lawless” by his contemporaries, for a time, Hastein was one of the most revered Viking raiders of his time. However, all people make mistakes, and our boy Hastein just happened to make his mistake in a major, public way.

After a successful raid down the Iberian Penninsula towards North Africa, Hastein and his brother Bjorn Ironside decided to take a little detour towards Rome to commandeer the supposed treasures that were held there. But to get into 9th century Rome, the two Viking chieftains need to think of something big. And this big plan that they ended up devising went down in infamy.

After arriving in Rome, Hastein ordered his men to carry him to Rome’s Cathedral and tell the people there he was dying and wished to convert to Christianity in his last moments on Earth. After being given the Sacraments, which 50 of his men were allowed inside the city to watch, Hastein sprung up, decapitated the priest, and led them on an epic attack of the city.

It was only until after he sacked the entire city, that he learned that the city he had just raided, was in fact not Rome, but Luna, a smaller town 249 miles north of Rome. Upon learning this, Hastein was so enraged that he burned down the entire town and killed everyone in it. Not the best response to something troubling, but who am I to judge?

The rest of Hastein’s life was lived in a disappointing life for a once infamous Viking chieftain. After some years of more failed raids, the Viking was killed in battle on the Thames River, proving that, even back then, you don’t have to be good at things to succeed at them.