Winfluenza

Winfluenza

“There’s something happening here, but what it is ain’t exactly clear.” –Buffalo Springfield, For What it’s Worth.

Is it a cold? The flu? COVID? Strep? Or a nasty blend? I don’t know, I’m no Dr. Fauci. What I do know is that these past weeks, the sounds of coughs, sneezes, and blown noises have percolated within thy pillar portals. Everyone has seemed to get sick sooner or later–I did this past week–and if you haven’t, I applaud your immune system. If you are sick or trying to avoid getting sick, here are a few tips. 

  1. Masala Chai

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I know the coveted Masala chai has only appeared through DSU events, but times like these call for such a remedy. You know that saying, “A masala chai a day keeps the sore throat away”, it’s true, and I’m not talking about that 6-dollar pumpkin spice BS from Starbucks, but the good stuff. If you are feeling a hint of soreness in the back of your throat or are in the thick of a cold, use this recipe: 

  1. Boil a 1 ½ cups of water
  2. Put in some graded ginger, crushed cardamom, and crushed cloves
  3. Add your favorite black tea
  4. Steep
  5. Add cream and sugar
  6. Enjoy!
  1. WASH UR DAMN HANDS

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Lathering your hands in hand sanitizer isn’t just a fantastic way to dry out your hands; it’s also not a substitute for soap and water. If the pre-schoolers above can do it, I’m sure you can as well. Bathrooms are on each floor within the high school, so do yourself a favor and go into one, get some soap, rinse thoroughly while singing your ABCs, and dry your hands.

  1. Invest in tissues before investment club does

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While the investment club was occupied with the cultish swearing-in ceremony, they failed to spot a prime opportunity to “buy low” in a commodity that is spiking in demand: tissues. This means that you should secure your tissues now before investment secures them all. Jokes aside, tissues might get hard to come by in the upcoming days, so consider bringing some from home. You will be glad you did.

  1. Stay home if you are sick

No one is asking you to be an Avenger, so if you are feeling really sick, please stay home. We will miss you, but your health and slowing the spread are first priorities. For good measure, email your teachers, get some sleep, drink your fluids, and make sure you eat and get some cough drops—Ricola original herb is my go-to. 

  1. Stay warm!

Staying warm is super important when sick, so whether you’ve got a sweater or sweatshirt, a blanket, or rock a flannel like Dr. Andy, you need to have the attire to battle the arctic WT climate. As we welcome fall, it’s only going to get colder, so be prepared. 

If you are sick, get better soon and stay safe!

Rishi