Admittedly, I am behind the times. As a member of the “younger” community in my grade, I gained another year of membership to the struggle club, and also a lovely (huge) slip of paper, designating my ability to legally drive in the company of my parental guardians. Pennsylvania law now requires a standard six month waiting period before someone in possession of the notorious Minor Learner’s Permit. Six months filled with my parents teaching me the ins and outs of the road, of driving with parents and getting irritated when they tell you “SLOW DOWN JESUS CHIRST PLEASE YOU NEED TO SLOW DOWN” at the sight of traffic ahead, but you know you’re already slowing down, because no human can compute their yelling and hit the brakes at the exact same time. Six months of thinking, “I Know, Mother”, of bargaining to drive home, of logging hours, and finally, of counting down the days until your driving test.

Picture this.

As the day comes, your confidence plummets and you find yourself wondering if you will ever be ready for the day. You practice turning hand-over-hand, and assuring that you’re stoping and signaling at a proper distance. Going out on more trips to practice parallel parking, you log in 15 minute trips, trying desperately to get your hours in. Your dad reads the reminder letter that was sent to your house of your appointment for the test and realizes that all vehicles must be legal for the test and goes into a panic. Half of the vehicles your family owns are immobile and the one you’re most familiar with has window tint, a tad darker than the legal standard. Preparation for your test then becomes driving your grandmother’s Acura the night before your test, learning the placement of all of the controls. Her car is half the size of all vehicles you’re used to, and finally, you realize you’re able to actually park properly between the lines of the stall. Your dad takes you out to old parking lots to practice and lets you get used to the car in time for the test, and you’re thinking maybe you’ll be okay.  

Come night time it’s 2am once you’ve finished all of your schoolwork, but it doesn’t matter because you’re not able to sleep anyway. Lying in bed, you’re thinking about all the things you might be able to do once you’re legally allowed to drive by yourself. But in the same moment, you don’t want to hope too hard because failure looms over your head as a large possibility.

The Next Morning

You wake up at 5am after a restless night, walk downstairs and make some hot chocolate to calm myself down. You’re sitting downstairs and doing work until 9 when you get to drive to your grandmother’s house to steal her car once again. After taking her car and receiving a “you’d better show me a card when you come back” you drive out into the city to where your DMV is. Pulling up in the lot, your parents are giving you tips for your test and all you feel is the pouting in your head from a lack of sleep. Walking in, you and your family have no idea what you’re doing, so you ask another Mom whose son is currently taking the test. The group sits and waits until your name is called by the testing man, and you walk out into the wilderness.

/* THE FOLLOWING CANNOT BE DISCLOSED AS IT IS A CLASSIFIED FEDERAL PROCEDURE WHICH SHALL NOT BE SHARED WITH THE PUBLIC */

Pulling back into the parking lot, you shut off the car and turn to the man who administered your test, taking a deep breath you wait for his answer,

“You passed. Congratulations!”